MINIONS

THE TYRANT's MINONS are collectively known militarily as the Gorgeous Guard. They all look exactly alike and are differentiated only in voice,dialect and personality. Here are the key recurring Minion characters:

FRICK and FRACK are the two bumbling nincompoops who work directly under the Tyrant. FRICK FIRGENS, quite possibly the smarter one, speaks with a slightly lower, grunty voice (Based on that of my highs school biology teacher). FRACK BOWERY speaks with a higher squeaky Brooklynese New York "Dead End Kid" voice and dialect, saying things like "Aw, geez, Bwoss!" They are the Larry and Curly to the Tyrant's Moe.

The SPOKESMINION, by his authoritarian nature, is obviously a higher ranking Minion than Frick & Frack. His job is to stonewall the press with Governmentese double-talk in a painfully droning voice. Although they haven't been seen talking to one another, it's a pretty sure bet that he talks like that to everyone, even the Tyrant, confounding him as much as he confounds reporters. Speaking in a thick Texas accent, the Spokesminion is based on every public official, police officer and gym coach that I experienced when I was growing up in Texas (I'm originally from California, but like George "Dubya" Bush, was transplanted to Texas long enough to develop a Texas accent). Many of the things the Spokesminion says are actually lifted straight from sound bytes or quotes from public officials in the news, and tweaked just a bit to fit Tyrannovision's needs.

The IRON LUNG SOUND GUY is a minion whose only job is to make that Darth Vader breathing sound to enhance the Tyrant's malevolent vibe. I haven't been using him as much because it's a pain in the ass to constantly composite him into videos with constantly changing angles, so I'm limiting his use to occasions where the Tyrant addresses the public.

The SENIOR DRILL COMMANDER (a.k.a. JEROME COTTONWOOD) is the guy who makes sure the troops march in correct formation, stand at attention, and present arms. He's there for a small platoon or the entire army. His character is that of the standard-issue fussy Gay dance choreographer...totally the opposite of the gruff Marine drill sergeant, but--as any professional dancer can tell you--just as abusive! Before a parade or battle formation he'll clap his hands in that annoying attention-grubbing fashion and say things like, "Okay, people! Just like we did in rehearsal, girls, but get it right this time....a-FIVE, SIX, SEVEN, EIGHT!" He is visually characterized by a different helmet with big pink feather plumes on it and a pink feather boa shrugged about his arms. Jerome will make his debut in the finale of "The Trial of Doctor Interact" as well as function as the Program Director for the TYRANNOPOD audio podcast.

The TROLLGRES are also new characters, not as yet introduced at the time of this posting. They're a different kind of Minion. 12ft tall, with gray skin and scant, spiky red uniforms, they are fearsome creatures to behold. No one is sure if they are Trolls or Ogres, so they refer to themselves in a hybridized term "Trollgre". Lumbering into battle they either wield giant hammers or are firing super-heavy artillery that a normal human couldn't lift. Their appearance strikes fear into those who behold them for the first time....until they speak. Then their true nature is revealed: they're basically by-the-book military clerks, so afraid of losing their jobs that they do not bend protocol for anybody, even the Tyrant! Your weapon jams or runs out of ammo in the heat of combat? Tough shit. You gotta fill out the proper requisition forms in triplicate! And they always seem to miraculously have these forms with them. This is why they have red uniforms: They're the RED TAPE guys!

The Trollgres speak in very thick Midwestern accents from the region of Tyrantulania knowns as "Wisconsota". Picture the movie Fargo, but with monsters instead of humans. "We Dohn't knoh if we're Trohlls 'r OHgres. We cahll ahrselves TrOHllgres, dohn'tcha knoh." Some are mechanics to the Tyrantmobile, always needing to "Ohrder mohre cahr pahrts", or they're traffic cops, riding around on disproportionately small motorcyles.

It is not known whether the Trollgres are a genetically engineered species or a naturally occurring mythological beast. I'm leaning toward the latter. The only reason the Tyrant gives for recruiting Trollgres into the Gorgeous Guard is that they're "big and scary."

The Trollgres will make their debut at the opening of the Tyrannovision feature-length movie, Empire Highway. I predict that they will become audience favorites very quickly.

MISCELLANEOUS OTHER "DIX" CHARACTERS

ANDY NOUNCER is the perky voice-over announcer doing the introductions to "Ask Your Tyrant" and the TYRANNOPOD. He also plugs a show's sponsors.  So far, Andy is only heard, but never seen. It might be a foregone conclusion that he's another Gorgeous Guard minion.

BILLY BOORE (a.k.a. "Caller #1" on the first "Ask The Tyrant" episode) is a documentary filmmaker in the Michael Moore mode, who keeps trying to interview the Tyrant, but never quite gets at him. I haven't really figured out a way to revive him on the show yet. I may have him do a series of short films, rather than be in the full-length movies.

BAHAMA BIN BADDEN-BADDEN is a "professional" terrorist from the country of Arabistan who leads the al-Bhundhi terrorist organization. A big fan of the "Ask The Tyrant" show, he likes to get technical advice from the Tyrant. Although he was killed off, I had a lot of fun playing Bahama, and since preposterous fantasy is a hallmark of TYRANNOVISION, I'm sure I could resurrect him in some fashion. He wil be aided and abetted by his mother, who is named--of course--BAHAMA-MAMA BIN BADDEN-BADDEN (Me in a black byrka and heavy eye makeup).

DUBYA (a.k.a. GEORGE W. BUSH) called in to "Ask The Tyrant" to request a dismantling of Tyrantulania's WMD stockpile, and only wound up pissing off the Tyrant, who suspects Dubya of being in cahoots with his passive-agressive nemesis, Sylar. Dubya is presented as a sort of Max Headroom-style animated character, complete with the electronic hiccups, which are strangely appropriate for the character since the real guy stutters a lot. Even though he's no longer occupying the White House, his evil nature makes him a wannabe tyrant, so he's working to get into the exclusive tyrant club, United Tyrants International (UT!), a sort of UN for despotic dictators and ubervillains.

COL. MUENSTER 7734 is an evil alien entity from the same planet as LT.ADAMS 2247. Having taken over the body of one of the Tyrant's minions, he operates from a secret base in the Tyrantulanian wastelands. His constant companion is an evil fluffy white Persian cat named Li'l Bastard (the late Binky the Cat). Because Lt. Adams is German, I wanted Col. Muenster to be German as well, but to differentiate his character distinctively from Dr. Klindowiener, I have Muenster speak only IN German. Peter (Lt. Adams) has functioned as my German dialog coach for the character. The further adventures of Col. Muenster are as yet unknown.

COURTBOTS were created especially for the courtroom scene of "Trial of Dr. Interact". I liked the idea of an "impartial" judge and jury (and bailiff) being made up entirely of machines. The courtbots consist of the Adjudicator XP Legal Computer, The Juroids, The Bailiff-Bot, and the Transl8R-bot.  I designed all the characters in Photoshop and animated them in ImageReady, SqirlzMorph, CrazyTalk, and Wild Photo Effects. They are 2D animated characters but with KrisInteract's new 3D skills could now be easily translated into 3D models. I used Audacity to robotize the voices of the characters in various ways.

The TYRANT's BIOLOGICAL FAMILY still resides in their Mt. Magma home, and will be introduced in "Empire Highway" in a supper table scene reminiscent of Eddie Murphy's stellar multiple character scenes in the Nutty Professor movies. No matter how rich or powerful you get, your bio-family is always there to take the piss out of you.

LA'VAH is a Balrog-like volcano god worshipped by the people of Mt. Magma, and who gave the Tyrant his supernatural powers. The Tyrant met him when he would regularly deflower the virgin women who were being sacrificed to La'Vah to appease the god from causing Mt. Magma to violently erupt and decimate the town.